December 28, 2011

NASA Car Broken Down

I made this up to entertain myself this morning...

A bunch of NASA guys are on a road trip and break down.   The engineer immediately hops out, pops the hood and tries to fix it.  The IT guy complains that this would not have happened had the key to the car been secure - he tells everybody to move away from the car as it could blow up at any second.   A Perl programmer exclaims, "I can get  this car running with ONE line!"   Nobody listens to the Perl programmer because he squeaks when he talks.  The C++ programmer scratches his head and says in a long low mysterious voice, "Is BrokenDown a noun or a verb?  Should it be BreakingDown?  What do we mean by Break and Broken?  Are these attributes of some entity?"   The mathematician hops out and begins walking for help all the while daydreaming of perfect cars, pothole-free roads, triangular trees and marshmallow clouds.  The secretary searches the car for paper.  The manager fears he will lose shotgun and remains seated and buckled in.  The entrepreneur whispers to the engineer, "Hey, if you get this car running, I'll give you $20."  He then goes to the manager and says, "I can get this car running for $30."  The rocket scientist surmises that they are out of gas and begins mixing odd things like water, grass, dirt and flowers to develop fuel.  The astronaut keeps turning the key madly pressing the accelerator, screaming, "Start, you bastard!"  The mission specialist commences to jumping jacks and Yoga. The cosmonaut jumps in the trunk, locks himself in and hollers, "All zee vodka eez mine!", and silently murmurs to himself, "Eez good to be back in zee womb."  The Co-op tries phone gestures on the rearview mirror.  The trainer takes out the car manual and begins corrections.  The C programmer begins dismantling the entire car starting at the back bumper. The night worker woofs a donut and steals the hubcaps.  The process guy exclaims, "All this could have been prevented".  This is followed by a litany of acronyms, acrostics, anagrams, palindromes and Where Is Waldo? references.  The open source guy hollers, "Let's push it one foot at a time.  By jove!  We can do this!  I'll start the Wiki!  We'll call it WikiGoGO!"  The Python programmer yelps, "Well let's at least push the car to the center of the shoulder!"  The mechanic says, "I'm on vacation".  He slugs a beer, grabs his fishing rod and heads out.

PS: Assuming no cell-phone coverage :-)

3 comments:

Frankie said...

lol... this is pretty funny man... mind if I share?

Keith said...

Share away... I just added one... the cosmonaut...

Robert said...

enjoyed this!