Unable To Change The Font

I just went into what sounded like a daddy rant.  Mr. Miller had requested that Kaley change the color on her newsletter - border white with gradient on inside.  He wanted lots of fonts.  He said she'd get a ZERO if she failed to include something or other.  Kaley asked me a few questions and proceeded to make changes.  I had a flashback of teaching morons and went into a semi-rant mode, "You know what?  There are people... if you asked them to change the font... just change the font... OR your dad, mother and sisters and brothers DIE... You know what???  He just wouldn't change the font.  He COULDN'T"  Kaley said, "Yeah, we're a bunch of nerds."  I said, "EXACTLY!  And that's good!"  I went on, "Okay, so the first round is dead.  The teacher says it again, 'Okay, so now if you don't change the font, you're extended family - cousins and everybody else is going to the firing squad.'" And throwing my hands up, I say, "And ALL the guy has to do is... what?  Change the font!  But No!  There's no way!  He CAN'T do it.  He'll either forget, stammer around, or beg and cry for mercy... but he CAN'T change the font.  He can't.  EVERYBODY is going to die... even if his own life is threatened.  He CAN'T change the font.  He CAN'T click it.  IMPOSSIBLE!  He just CANNOT do it.  I mean he cannot do it. Just no way.  Just do the job.  But he can't.  He'll eat Cheetos and hamburgers and play that stupid crap military shoot and kill everybody for hours and say duh and watch videos of guys squirting milk out of their eyeballs... but he CANNOT change the font..."

Kim pipes in, "Daddy I think he would save his family."  I say, "NO!  Does this sound like a rant?  I'm serious.  He can't change the font."

Kaley says, "Daddy is right, I know'em.  He wouldn't change the font.  He couldn't."